As I scowl through my Facebook news feed today, it is filled with so many celebrations new babies, a few ordinations, baptisms, birthdays, friends learning new skills. Just so many blessings and things to be thankful for. What amazing people you all are!
So, I went to church on Sunday where we looked at Ephesians 6 (the Armor of God bit). As I sit here, having done three loads of washing, I still need to put another load on, empty the dish washer, do various Mummy jobs, give eldest medicine (and pray it stays down) and wake up the youngest poo machine (who will no doubt be grumpy), I don’t feel very awesome like you lot are. I feel numb, anxious and unable to concentrate (as this post will probably demonstrate).” Try to be positive” I tell myself, “Your being an idiot to feel this way. There is nothing wrong with you. Exercise, and equip yourself with coping mechanisms (or in Christian terms, pray, read the Bible and put on your Armor), this will change your mood.”
Even as I’m tying this there is a niggle in my head saying “what a crock of sh*t, these things won’t make a difference. Your just fooling yourself because you are gullible, weak and stupid” Is it just me that has these negative thoughts? Or is it just that I am in a season of dwelling on them? I have no idea to be honest. I can’t be totally lost to wallowing in my own head because I feel so grateful for my family. My folks and in laws who have come to help and provided much needed support . They took over household jobs, helped clear up sick, entertained the kids, and cooked where I just didn’t have the energy to. They made me feel valuable and gave me some rest. With this in mind I’m going to employ those other tactics once sickness leaves our household…..Also I just laugh, some times life is just too ridiculousness.
Now if you will excuse me I’m waiting for my sick husband to bring my sick mother in law back from a&e, while my sick child plays Skylanders, the other naps and I need to empty the dishwasher.